Hetare blogpost~ (??!!!)

Hi,everyone.. It's been a ridiculously long time since the last time I updated my blog entries. Haha~ XD

Ever since I loved an anime which named "Axis Power Hetalia" (APH) --started from 8 June 2010--, I started to feel concerned about countries around the world. I love Hetalia,and wondering badly about when will the manga arrives in Indonesia.. :s
I luph N.Italy x Germany pairings,they were adorable! Haha~!! XD

Oh yeah.. Anyway,few days ago,me,my bro and my mum flew from Medan to Surabaya (plus my aunt who flew from Jakarta to accompany us there),because my bro suffers Hemifacial Spasm,and want to have brain surgery in Husada Utama Hospital in Surabaya.
That was the first time I visit Surabaya,and it was awesomely awesome.
Despite the heatness of that sunlit town,Surabaya is amazing. As the 2nd biggest town in Indonesia,it is really really different from Medan. The roadways were wide,and almost look alike Jakarta. It's like Jakarta ver.2 (???) to me. :o

I still remember the moment just before the nurses took my bro to the operating theatre.. I said "GBU ya ko.." ("GBU,bro..") to his ears just before he finally disappears beneath the door that separates my bro from me,my mum,and my aunt.
I hugged his Bible,while keep praying for God,so that He gives His blessing to my bro,and all the surgeons.. And I feel peaceful. I believe that everything would be fine,as long as God's with us. :)
And it really did. The keyhole surgery was succesfull. My bro's face is now normal. God sure really shows His mightiness. HALELUYA!!! >XD

And starting from 2 days ago,we flew to Jakarta,and stays in my aunt's house. How I really miss these moments and this place..and my cousins.
But,actually.. Somehow I feel that day-by-days passing by while I'm in Jakarta were not as fun as I seems..
..it's because all my cousins were all busy..
But oh yeah,I hope that there will be a free day for my cousins.. I really hopes that I could make precious memories with my cousins before I fly back to Medan at this Monday.. ><
Until this day,I think grabbing my handy phone to surf the internet using the Wi-Fi in my cousins' room is the best moment while I'm spending my days in Jakarta.. I even downloaded 8 versions of "Marukaite Chikyuu",the OST of Axis Power Hetalia!!! (Japan,Germany,Prussia,Russia,France,Austria,Holy Roman Empire,Austria)

I saw on someone's journal on DeviantArt ( http://www.ayamasullivan.deviantart.com/journal/31893235/ ) that Holy Roman Empire's version is so sad,so I became curious and searched for the song.. And when I heared that song,and saw the lyrics,I could feel my heart crying. I think this song really is the saddest version of "Marukaite Chikyuu". I could feel such agony feeling in this song.. I dunno how to say.. But his sadness of really wanting Italy as the love of his life (even though,we know,that Italy is actually a boy that wears girl's dress. O_O) really driving me to say "PERFEKTO UNO!!" (???) for this song. Really amazing.

..ahh,and I wish that somehow there will be merchandises of APH in Jakarta.. I drool myself by knowing that there were trading cards,keychains,even fragrance set of APH in Japan,but none of them arrives in Indonesia. D;

Whenever it happens,only God knows.

Let God be the "director" of my life and my saviour,now and for always. :)

~ 30 June'10

P.S. Do you like APH too? Do you have DeviantArt account? Share with me here,so we could talk about our interests in APH together.. :D

God.. please forgive me..

Today,I'm a very stressed person in the world.

Yet all of the problems I had today happens & became even MORE worse.. because of my PMS. (?!?!???)
Yeah,PMS.
I must admit that this is the first time in my whole life,that I've been driving to mad because of a thing called PMS. (..oi.. nih anak ga punya urat malu apa,diumbar2kan sampe segitunya.. -_-;;)

Today seems like nightmare..
Every problem seems to gather together in me,just for this day.
For example,because of my PMS (oi,oi.. --;;),my usually-calm emotion gets wrecked devastatedly. I had bad mood all over this day,and my heart (MY HEART,because I'm not the type of person who scolds people easily) gets easily angry at some people in my class..

Even though I never want to,but it actually did.

Then,another "breaking news" actually happens.

My friend told me that our head teacher came inside our class when I was having lunch with my friends.. And that teacher said that--
FROM 58 PUPILS IN OUR CLASS,ONLY 2 PUPILS COULD RECEIVE THEIR SCHOOL REPORT.
THE REST OF THIS CLASS MUST ASK THEIR PARENTS TO WRITE A LETTER TO HIM,SAYING THAT THEIR PARENTS WILL PURSUE THESE PUPIL TO LEARN HARDER.

..wicked,isn't it??

I almost crying when I heard that.

Actually,besides that problem,I have another problem,too..
I have a disease..
Disease,that makes me want to scream as if I were completely mad.

This wrecked mood in my heart deteriorates me..
I kept this feeling in my heart,so suffering.

I wanna cry. I wanna weep. I want God to quickly take me into Heaven,so that I would never feel this problem anymore. NEVER.

Even Ms.Wendy,the teacher who starts to teach in my class in Australian Center Medan,whose behaviour attracts me from the first sight (??) couldn't help making my feelings better.

My heart bleeds. It seems that the Devil had completely invades my heart by this freaking PMS.

Until the moment I got back home (after went to the chemistry with my mum,to buy me some medicine),that's what I think..

Because somehow,my temperature starts to increase & makes me difficult to move,which -as I'd assumed- completes my suffer today.

And the pressure multiplies.. because even though I believe that I'm going to caught fever,I couldn't tell it to my mum.
She herself is also suffers with her previous-effect-caused-by-diarrhoea. Besides,on 24 May'10,I'm having my FINAL SCHOOL TEST,which completely urges me to keepattending my class,no matter how painful the suffer I had now.


..Jesus..

Jesus,where are You??

You said that You always accompany me wherever I go,'till the end of time..

If You really are here,watching me in this condition,please tel me that You're here..

The next thing I remembered was,I went downstairs,I read my Bible that's in my room,and after that I prayed..
I pray for God,so that He could completely forgive me from all of my sins that I've made..
I prayed for the safety of all the ones I love in my life..
and I also prayed for the recovery of the diseases I had right now.

Then,after I finished..
I suddenly wants to.. hold my Bible..

It may seems strange,but I know my heart isn't close enough to His presence yet,so I did it. I just hugged my Bible instead..
And something strange happens..

My tears starts to fell down..

I could feel His love surrounding me,the warmth of His love..
Yeah,the love that He had give me freely..
I cried while still holding my Bible..

Please forgive this sinful person,God..
Forgive me,and never let the Devil invades my heart anymore..
I'm sorry,Lord,for letting my heart filled with anger & hate all this day..
I surrender all into Your Hands,Jesus...


Soon after I opened my eyes & wiped my tears off,I feel much better.
Hope that His blessings lasts forever,including in your life too.. ^^
May God bless your life~ :D

~ 18 May'10

..what a peaceful week (I think) :P

Hi,everyone~ :D
This is my first posting on this blog.. I'm writing this while listening music from my handphone. (my math teacher is currently absent,making this 80 minutes become "freizeit" in my class!! HURRAY~!!! XD)

..yeah,I'll tell u the reason why I wrote the one that's on the title of this posting.
Starting from 27 April'10,it has been raining (or at least cloudy).. Kinda weird,because all this time (including last DECEMBER. -_-) the sun nearly incinerates Indonesia (?!) because of its temperature that always driving me mad.

Ich Verhasst die Sonne. I hate being heated by the sun. That's why I always in a bad mood everytime the sun goes overheating. I love cloudy weather~ :P

Yeah,until today in Medan (North Sumatera,Indonesia) is also cloudy.
And I could feel the atmosphere inside my classroom.. Very peaceful.
I'm currently sketching a picture of Tokio Hotel,with fairy theme just like "Arthur and the Minimoys".. *well,I'm also blogging here~ ^^;;*
Beside me,I could see some of my classmates doing some business. They sells snacks (such as wafers,seaweeds,etc.) and ask everyone whether to buy them or not. Some of them sells silicon case for handphone,too..

And I was just wondering..

There was a quiz held by kaWanku magazine in Indonesia..
They told us to take a picture of ourselves with an article of Tokio Hotel inside the latest edition of that magazine,and we send them via email or facebook to kaWanku,and then they will choose the best picture.
Nah,the winner who took the best picture will win a free ticket to KL,and free ticket to watch Tokio Hotel's concert in KL on 1 May'10.. But only ONE person could be the winner.
Yesterday was the LAST DAY to upload the picture,so I access the internet to upload mine to kaWanku,hoping that I could win and my mum would like to come along to accompany me in KL..
Unfortunately.. The winner has been announced. And I was like.. shocked when I saw that. (5% angry,20% shocked,12% sad,63% breathing. *?!* )

But never mind.

Maybe God wants to say that the right time hasn't come yet for me to meet them. I believe that someday God would meet me with them,without forcing me to "sacrifice" my final exam day for my English course,making me absent for one day in my school,and making me unable to go to church and feel the presence of the Salvation.
(besides,I've told my friend on DA who lives on Malaysia to record their concert~ :P)

I really don't mind,and I face this fact,mit der Weitherz.
Instead,I thanked God.. For all the blessings He gave me all this time.
Thank You Lord,for this live You gave me into this world..
Thank You Lord,I have family that cares for me & raised me since I was born to this world..
Thank You Lord,You gave me friends that understands me,supports me & cares for me in every situation..
and.. Thank You Lord,Your love is irreplacable. You know everything in my heart,You supports me & never let me suffer alone with all the problems I had all this time.

..and of course I thanked Him for this peaceful week~!! XD
May His blessings be with you,too..
May God blesses every steps u take in your life.
GBU all~ ^^

- 29 Apr'10

P.S. I'm currently planning to do art comissions on DA (DeviantArt.com),and they who request me to draw something for them could pay me using subscriptions on DA.. Whaddaya think?? :P